Sunday, November 23, 2014

One more tale of woe

Friday was the beginning of a week’s vacation and I had so many things planned. My biggest goal was painting my bathroom in time for Thanksgiving. Right now 15 people total should be gathered around my table on Thursday and I wanted them all to be able to use my bathroom with bright, fresh walls.

I’ve had a back ache all week, nothing bad, just enough to slow me down a bit. Saturday I had signed up for a craft show to sell our Kenyan crafts for our nonprofit, and the hubby and I were able to set up most of it Friday night. All I had to do Saturday morning was put out a few more things and organize a little bit. I stopped at the gas station for a bottle of ice tea, as I hadn’t slept much the night before because I was worrying about stupid stuff.

I got back in the car with my drink and – boom – just like that my back went out. We have patients all the time complaining about back trouble. Yes, I believe them that their back hurts, but when they are walking down the hall, I find it hard to sympathize with them, because I can see by the way they hold themselves, that even if they’re in pain, their back is not “out”. When my back is out, when I’m standing in front of the mirror in my underwear, it is obvious something is wrong. My right hip is out of place by at least three or four inches. I’m not kidding, I look like I could be in a carnival side show. I feel pretty pathetic when I walk, because I can’t make myself not limp. I also try to hang onto something so that if my back spasms, I don’t fall down. Because falling down would be like a turtle lying on its shell. “I’ve fallen down and I can’t get up.”  

I could go on, but let’s cut to the chase. I got through the sale, sitting in my chair as much as I could, selling some stuff and talking about the nonprofit to anyone who would listen. I came home and went to bed. At least I am now caught up on my sleep. By the end of today I may even be caught up on my reading. Writing? I can only hope. If I sit too long in my office chair, as comfy as that it, my back does lock up and moving again is quite the chore.

And all the while those bathroom walls are calling me. No, I think they are mocking me. So what did I get done this week before I became disabled?

Big goal - Publish “The Early Life of Jesus in 40 Days” Let’s just concentrate on the positive. We have finalized the cover and, at least on line, it looks better than I could have imagined. It makes me all the more excited in anticipation of holding the actual book in my hands. My publisher says that we are ahead of schedule, but I am looking at the calendar, trying to figure out just what schedule that is and how I am going to have books to sell before Christmas. Oops, that does not sound like I am looking on the bright side, does it?
Small goals – Look, I deleted my small goals because you had to be getting bored with all the no’s.

So, I guess I can work on the small goals this week and those bathroom walls can just mock me all they want. 
At least the cover of the book isn't mocking anyone.


  1. Ouch, popping your back out like that is nasty! That happened to me the first time when I was 21, my hip got twisted backwards by 3cm. I ran around all lopsided, in the end couldn't move. Now I see a chiropractor 2x a year at least, as my back keeps doing it no matter what I try. And as soon as I think I can actually do more sports and work on the muscles - plop - back out. One of my legs is constantly about 1cm shorter than the other, so you do have my sympathies!

    The cover looks awesome! I hope everything book-related goes according to plan!

    1. When my back used to go out a couple times a year, I went to the chiropractor too. That usually helped pretty quickly. Now, since my right hip always swings out to the side, whenever this happens, I sleep with a pillow under my right hip and it usually corrects itself in a day or two. But it is still a huge drag when it happens.

  2. A friend once told me that being sick or in pain gives us time to reflect further on what we are doing, how, and why. I don't agree. Being in so much pain takes courage and tenacity to simply get through each day. The head and heart still know what you want to do, but the body is unwilling. You already have the gift of reflection and commitment. I'm hoping that back pain eases so you can truly enjoy this Thanksgiving and the joy of family and friends gathering around you. And I do love your book cover!

  3. You just ignore those bathroom walls - take no attitude! I'm sending your lots of positive energy and hope your back pain eases soon. Good luck with your book goals and listen to your've got this in the bag :-)